The Playground in Kalm
by merani
Summary: What happens when the chibi FF7 characters are at the playground?


It was a sunny day in Kalm. Practically everybody from all   
over the Planet was in Kalm, because of the giant sales in   
the stores.  
  
6 year old Sephiroth looked around the playground.   
Like many other children here, he had been dropped  
off here to amuse himself while his 'mother' Jenova  
was out shopping.   
  
He spotted a group of children who were standing  
around a coffin.  
  
"Is he eva' gonna wake up?" asked a girl clad in pink,   
her long brown hair tied in a ribbon.  
  
"Shh! Yoo no Vinny doesn't like bein' waken up!" said  
another long, brown haired girl. She lightly punched the  
girl in pink with her gloved hand.  
  
"Hey, dun punch Aweeth!" yelped a spikey blonde boy.  
  
"SHUT THE @#$% UP!" screamed a blonde haired boy,  
who had a lolipop in his mouth (subsituting a cigarette).  
  
The coffin shook a bit.  
  
"Whooa, dat vampire 'foo is wakin' up!" The dark skinned boy  
exclaimed, tapping his gun arm on the coffin.  
  
"AAHH! Vampaiyah? I'M GUNNA DIIEE!" shrieked a short   
haired girl who wielded a shuriken.  
  
Nearby the circle was a giant moogle with a cat on top of it,  
and next to it was a red lion.  
  
"C'mon, Nanki, lemme read yer fortune!!"  
  
"Its NANAKI! Not Nanki!"  
  
"Whateva!"  
  
And underneath the slide, there was another group of  
chibis. They all had the same uniforms on, except for   
the blonde haired kid, who had a white outfit.  
  
"My gun is cooler!" exclaimed the blonde in the white outfit.  
  
"No, my nightstick is *HIC!* better than *HIC!* yours!" said a   
red headed boy, drunkenly.  
  
"Oh my gosh, Reno, are you drunk?" shrieked a blonde haired girl.  
  
"*Hic!* yea!"  
  
"BUT YOU'RE 15 YEARS UNDER THE DRINKING AGE!"  
  
"So is *hic* Rude!"  
  
"...." the bald headed, sunglass bearing boy 'said'.  
  
"Shut up, Rude!" said a long, black haired boy.  
  
Sephiroth looked around again. His eyes wandered back to the group  
around the coffin.  
  
He walked over to them, and whipped out his Masamune.  
  
"What're you doin'? Tell meh or I'll... or I'll... CHOP YOO INTO  
PIECES!"  
  
The chibi's stared at the silver haired villian.  
  
"Hoo are yoo?" they all said at the same time.  
  
"I'm Sef-ee-rof!" Sephiroth smiled proudly, 'veni veni venias' suddenly  
heard in the background.  
  
"Well I'm Clod!" screamed "Clod". Sephiroth sniggered, realizing  
this chibi had no clue he mispronounced his name.  
  
"I'm Teefa!"  
  
"Barret, you foo'!"  
  
"Aweeth!"  
  
"Yuff!"  
  
"Cid!" Cid suddenly took the now gone lolipop out of his mouth, replacing it  
with a new one.  
  
'Sef-ee-rof' put the Masamune back in its place. "Sooo, whaddya doin'?"  
  
"Vinnie's in dere!" Tifa explained, "He won't wake up!"  
  
"Oh." Sephiroth toddled over to the coffin and suddenly started   
whacking the top of it with his sword.  
  
"WAKE UP OR MY MOMMY WILL KILL YOO!"  
  
Suddenly a black haired boy popped out of the coffin.  
  
"Ha-ha, you fell for it!"   
  
Vinnie said nothing.  
  
Suddenly, the group in uniforms came running over.   
  
"We declare war!" yelled the red headed boy.  
  
"Why?" asked Tifa.  
  
"Dunno, juss somethin' ta do!" shrugged the long black haired  
boy. He suddenly started chasing after Aerith.  
  
"Ah-huh? Whatcha doin', 'Seng?"  
  
"I wuv yoo, Aerith!" Aerith started running away from Tseng, screaming.  
  
The blonde haired girl in the uniform started crying. "B-but..  
I thought... you wuved me, Tsengie! Yoo promised me to  
take mee to dinner!"  
  
"..Oh, yea, dats right, I did!"  
  
Tseng and Elena skipped away.  
  
Reno was swinging his nightstick around and poking Cloud with it.  
Cloud couldn't defend himself, because the Buster Sword was still  
too big for him to hold up.  
  
"Hey, Cloudie, why doncha use your hair?" suggested Tifa.  
  
"Good idea, Teefa!" Cloud backed up and ran into Reno headfirst.  
  
"OWWWW!" Reno screamed, and ran away.  
  
Rude and Vincent also participated in this 'war'.  
  
"..."  
  
"..."  
  
"......"  
  
"............."  
  
"....."  
  
"....Heehee. I win. I said more dots dan yoo did!" Vinnie smiled,  
something he rarely did.  
  
Rude growled and walked away in defeat.  
  
Barret held his gun arm up to the future president of ShinRa.  
  
"Yoo is goin' down, Rufus!"  
  
"Heehee, shut up, you Mr. T Wannabe!" Rufus giggled at his own joke.  
  
Suddenly, a random black panther plushie fell out of the air, which Cid caught.  
  
"Go catch, you #@%^ !@#$%^&!!!" Cid threw the plushie.  
  
"..NOO! DARK NATION! COME BACK, KITTY!" Rufus cried, running after  
the black panther plushie. He caught the plushie, and looked around,  
realising his friends had been defeated.  
  
"You may have won this... but... you'll NEVER be President of  
a totally evil company! Heehee!" Rufus said, walking away.  
  
Sephiroth watched the whole thing. He smiled wickedly.  
  
"Soo, yoo weirdo's think you're all dat?"  
  
Cloud nodded. The rest of them shrugged.  
  
"How would you like to FIGHT MEE?" Sephiroth's  
wicked smile got even bigger, as he unsheaved his  
Masamune.  
  
Suddenly, all the AVALANCHE chibi's burst out laughing.  
  
"Whatso funny?"  
  
Suddenly, Cloud and Vincent grabbed the Masamune from Sephiroth.  
Tifa and Barrett grabbed his hands so he couldn't go anywhere, and  
Cid got in front of Sephiroth his lance threatening Sephiroth if he moved.  
  
Vincent and Cloud set the sword down. Aerith came skipping into the playground  
with a bucket of pink paint.  
  
"EEYAK! WHADDAREYOO GONNA DO TO MY MASAMUNE?!?"  
  
Aerith dumped the bucket of pink paint all over the Masamune.  
  
Sephiroth's bloodcurling scream could be heard all over   
the world, in Gongaga, Nibelheim, Midgar...  
  
--  
  
The rest of the day, Sephiroth stayed in a tunnel, weeping over  
his now pink Masamune. Until finally...  
  
"SEPHIROTH? Sepphyy! Where are you?" Jenova yelled for  
her 'son'.  
  
Sephiroth crawled out of the tunnel and immediatly latched himself onto  
his mothers leg.  
  
"I NEVER WANT TO COME HERE AGAIN!"  
  
"Okay, Sephy, lets go home..."  
  
As they left, Sephiroth passed by Cloud and co.  
  
"Bye-bye, Sephiroth....hope you'll play with us again...heehee..."  
  
Sephiroth narrowed his eyes, vowing he would get revenge.  
  
By painting Cloud's buster sword NEON pink!  
  
------------------------- 


End file.
